It can cause us everything from a bit of anxiety—that pit in our stomachs—to outright panic. But when it comes to our relationships when can feel uncertainty when we walk into a crowded room, meet a new boss, or make a sales call. And at the core of those experiences, we all want to reduce our sense of uncertainty.
So how can we lower that uncertainty quickly and build better and more productive relationships? By learning how, when, and where to ask the right questions.
Consider this question: What did you do last night? It’s a simple question. But it has a possibility of evoking a remarkable variety of emotions based on how, when, and where we ask.
If it’s said gently to a teenager, even when we believe they’ve been up to something inappropriate, it might evoke a quiet, “not much.” But if we ask it in the form of an accusation, WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT? it’s likely to evoke a denial, or worse, anger. And if we wake them in the middle of the night ask—no matter what tone we use—we’re only creating more uncertainty and anxiety. But what if we phrased it this way after the teenager has slept the night, had breakfast and is wide awake? Tell me about your evening last night? Wouldn’t we avoid some uncertainty and have a more productive conversation?
When we’re with a prospect—particularly one who might not know us well—each us trying to lower uncertainty. The prospect wants to know if we are competent, honest, and that our product is fairly priced and best for him. So we might ask him, “What would you like to know about me and my company or our products?”before anything else. If you’re a sales person and want to become a trusted-advisor,reducing your prospect’s uncertainty first will allow you to offer something about your expertise, the benefits of your product, or even personal references in return. Once we’ve done that, we can move on to ask our own questions about his business needs and do so in such a manner that inspires confidence in us as an advisor.
There’s much more to be said about asking questions and reducing uncertainty—and we know the teenager example might seem a little extreme. But in the coming weeks, we’ll show you have you can use this technique with employees to lead more effectively, reduce stress, and improve employee engagement.
If you’ve found this information useful, encouraging or might see a way we can improve it, please let us know. And if you thought it was encouraging, forward it to a friend so they can subscribe. If you want to find out more about how Performance Strategies Group helps organizations sharpen their sales skills and processes, builds more self-aware and resilient leaders, or equip more productive teams, find us online at http://www.psghsv.com, or call Principal Consultant, Jim Owens @ 256-426-0305.